The selfish website

Have you ever noticed that there’s a big difference between a website you think is awesome… and one that looks as if it was written by monkeys at typewriters?

Side bar: for many of us, writing a website triggers us emotionally. You are a smart person. You are great at helping your people in a particular way—and you have the results to back it up. But when it comes to clearly expressing that in writing, you seize up.

There’s something about your writing appearing on glowing light boxes across the country (and around the world). You WANT to draw business from all over. But you are putting an enormous amount of pressure on yourself to find the PERFECT words and express what you do exquisitely.

And—can we be honest here?—you don’t want to sound like everyone else. You don’t want to sound like a dork, either. And you see how transformational your work is, so it’s been really tough to whittle that down to something sassy and snappy and clear.

End side bar.

The more coaches and service professionals I teach to write their own web copy, the more I notice that we aren’t just writing together. Here’s what I ALSO do for my writing clients:

I invite you to put your big girl panties on so I can snap them.

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Because I want you to wake up. I want you to see that your website is a tool you use to attract your favorite (joyful, paying) clients and invite them into your tent, and that’s it.

It’s not a catalogue of who you are and everything you do. It’s not you “proving” to the world that you have gone your own road—or are a success. It’s not convincing your audience that your training and credentials make you worthy of hiring.

It’s not even your love letter to the world.

I know this may sound cruel. But if you can hear me out, it may just cause your business to shift in a really profound, wonderful way.

Sometimes we love something so much, we fumble for words to express it in a way that other people understand.

And instead of reaching out for new skills (writing copy that connects with people in a real and intimate way) or new ideas (the best marketing comes from a deep desire to serve, whether or not they buy from you)… we build a fortress around our business and say “it’s YOUR job to understand me—if you don’t get it, I don’t want to work with you.”

Snap, snap, snap goes the elastic.

I write this clearly because I know this situation personally.

I’ve been writing since I was a kid. It’s like one big conversation between me and myself. And, at the risk of sounding arrogant, it’s one of the best conversations I’ve ever had.

But instead of writing to connect with my audience, I wrote to amuse myself. Which was fine when I was making stuff up with friends or writing in my journal.

And then, in my early 30s, I started writing short plays that got picked up and produced. And I started writing promotional copy. And everything changed. (Read about how one of my plays bombed because I never bothered to consider my audience.)

The best way I can say it is that I had to get still, grounded and clear within myself in order to write words that move others. It was no longer about expressing myself—it was about crafting a message that resonated with other people.

Whoa! Right? Who knew, that there are all different intentions within writing… and that, for your copy to connect and move people, you must get your own ego to step aside.

That’s is an ongoing practice that I do, and teach my clients to do, too.

In fact, I’m just realizing all this now! In my 20s, my attitude was “you don’t get what I’m saying… too bad for you” (flattering, I know). As I march toward my late-30s, I look down and there’s this big, steamy plate of humble pie in front of me.

What can I write that meets my tribe where THEY are?

How do I create more calm in my own life, so that I can be a truth-teller in service to others?

Am I willing to “murder my darlings” in my copy so that my words can have more impact and help my ideal clients feel seen, understood, and inspired to act?

There’s a bravery to writing in this way, and it isn’t always easy or instant. But it does connect. You can learn it (even if you aren’t a “writer).

And it does win you raving fans and a loyal clientele. In this marketplace of hucksters and “only 10 spots left!” (when there are 54), writing this way will help you stand out like nothing else. But only if you reach out past what you already know how to do, and put your big girl panties on.

What’s been your experience with writing copy that connects? And what’s been your biggest challenge? Leave a comment in the space below.

Mighty thanks to Jemima G flickr photostream for the typing monkey.