Masters need a different conversation

Last week, we talked about whether you work with beginners or masters.

(If you missed it, you can read that here.)

If you’ve been in business awhile, you’ve noticed that as you hone your skills and craft, the people who show up in your world tend to shift as well.

The trouble is, there is often a big ole gap between the work you do with people, and how your marketing talks about it.

Quick story here.

My friend Dr. Nadia teaches masters how to improve their sales conversations and process, in a New Sales way. (Read: without being manipulative or predatory, or as she calls it ‘like a lady’).

She recently taught a training called something like “sleaze to ease” about how to have these conversations with prospective clients.

She teaches this really fun idea that to get more clients, you need to get 100 people to say no to you.

This is because most people fear rejection more than they fear not having enough clients.

If you can make your desire for clients bigger than your fear about it not working, you’re on your way.

So anyway. Dr. Nadia taught this concept of the ‘100 No’s’ on her training.

And a woman wrote back after the call, to say thanks and that she will be ‘thinking about’ the 100 No’s.

When Dr. Nadia told me that, here’s what I said:

Two things for you here:

There is a difference between ‘thinking about’ a situation and ‘DOING something’ to change it.

Beginners ‘think about’ it.

Masters act on what they know is theirs to do.

See the difference?

Listen. It’s not mine to judge this woman. But it is my job to help YOU see the difference between when you are having a conversation with a beginner, and when you are in conversation with a master.

And to decide who you want your marketing to call in.

Masters take time to reflect, but they don’t say “I’m thinking about what you told me would solve my problem, and I like it, but I’m not going to do it.” (Which is a paraphrase of what the lady said to Dr. Nadia).

Masters are already highly motivated to act on what matters to them.

And masters know what is for them and what isn’t – which means you don’t actually need to convince or manipulate them into working with you, because they’ll already know you’re their person.

Okay, so I’m getting kinda subtle here.

But let’s press on . . .

I teach the ‘hero’s journey’ story as a foundation for creating marketing so you have a simple way to talk to people about what you do, resonate with higher-quality clients, and promote your work effectively (without being manipulative or predatory).

(I’ll be walking you through the hero’s journey at the New Marketing call this week – you can join that conversation here:

Everyone’s on a hero’s journey. But beginners are crossing a much different threshold than the one masters cross.

Beginners are still deciding whether or not they want to leave their comfort zone.

Like the woman who told Dr. Nadia she’s ‘thinking about’ the 100 No’s.

Maybe they aren’t sure that a better life is even possible.

Maybe they aren’t sure they have what it takes to experience that kind of transformation.

Maybe they are not sure whether they are worthy.

Hey, many of us have been there. That’s not my personal story, but I have worked with HUNDREDS of coaches, healers, and consultants at this point, and I’ve heard their stories. It’s a common thread.

But if you work with masters, this particular hero’s journey is not interesting.

In fact, another way of putting it is that you find it boring.

Unless it’s your calling to do your best work here, it’s boring to witness people deciding whether or not they can have the life they want.

Oh, am I being blunt?

May my bluntness be of service to you today.

Masters are crossing a threshold too.

They are leaving behind the status quo too.

But the threshold they are crossing isn’t about their choice to live a life of alignment and the other good stuff (peace, self-mastery, freedom, etc) –

But a master’s journey tends to be more about external opposition.

A parent whose teenage daughter with ADHD isn’t getting the support she needs at school.

A woman who needs to stand up to her spouse, boss, or family.

A man whose corporate career looks impressive on the outside, but on the inside, he feels hollow and alone.

Some of you are also working with masters who have gone on the adventures of the first two acts– and now are moving on to the adventures of the third.

Third act adventures are about making one’s vision a reality in the world.

The adding of philanthropic work to one’s business ventures.

The legacy work of coming to understand what ideas will outlive you when you go.

The “I can see what I want to create but I’m getting bogged down in the details” of the multi-million dollar business owner.

You see?

You see how the conversations are different… and the marketing is different… depending on who is showing up to work with you?

Everyone is on a journey.

But which journey are your favorite clients on?

And how can you get that into all your marketing, so it resonates and they feel it in their bones, that you’re the person for them?

If you’d like to work with me privately to get clear about who your ideal client really is and write it into your next project, there are two New Marketing Alliance spots open for September.

(Note: I’m taking the month of July off to go to Japan for a family wedding and my honeymoon, and will not bring my laptop. Or my cell phone. Or be available to my clients. Hooray! We’ll pick up where we left off in August.)

Keep up the good work,

Stella Orange teaches her clients how to effectively market their business by telling a better story in their marketing— the story of the hero answering the call to more. A professional copywriter whose writing has generated millions of dollars in sales, Stella knows that the story we tell in our marketing matters a whole lot, because on a fundamental level, it shapes how people think about themselves and what’s even possible for them. Three times a month, Stella hosts a 90-minute Shut Up And Write session via videoconference for members of her Write Club community. She is based in Buffalo, New York, where she lives with her husband, the Philosopher, and their dog, Chachi. Get a copy of Stella’s position paper The New Marketing: How to Create Clients Without Feeling Gross, Icky or Manipulative at

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